hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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