I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
