party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Michael Bay diarrhea
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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