You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
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