Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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