I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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