we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I'm like, not good at living.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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