She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
