I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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