god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
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either way he was missing a nipple.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
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this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..