I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
