Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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