i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
