Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Randomize
