Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I need a burrito and a hug.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
