I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
