Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
