I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
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Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
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Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
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