I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.