I am in a vortex of obligation.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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