So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
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