We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
he fucked my hip out of place.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Help me help you realize you are a moron
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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