If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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