apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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