Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
