Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
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Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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