Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
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just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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