I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
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