Writing my paper on freud at bar
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.