Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
