i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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