Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
