Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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