Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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