She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
