Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
