you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
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