Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
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