So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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