garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Randomize