Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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