I hate your face
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
dude i'm inner monologue high
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
wow bdsm is so cute
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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