Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
