you win again, gameday.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
