Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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