the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
