Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
