Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
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