he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Even my vagina gasped.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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