obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
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