Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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