i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.